A leech from the past sucks at today's dreamer!

Recurring dreams can be among the most upsetting of dreams and by that same token, among the most helpful in moving a dreamer forward in her waking life.  Consider today’s example – a recurring dream of leeches sucking the lifeblood from our dreamer!

Dear SMYD,

A few nights ago I dreamed of an old boyfriend from way back in my past, “Johnny.”  I became so frustrated with him!  He got the idea early in his life that he didn’t have to work very hard.  At a young age he was already head and shoulders above any competitors.  Then, as he grew up and rose in the ranks, he found himself among others equally talented.  It was harder him to stand out.  But instead of working harder, his efforts became lackluster.  So he plateaued.  He lived on his laurels and outgrew them.  Instead of sending him to the top of his game, his talents and early success sent him on a low trajectory. 

For whatever reason, I dream of him two or three times a year!  The dreams vary a little, but most of them are like the one this week:  I feel an itch and look down and see that to my horror, a leech is clamped onto to my arm.  When I pull it off, I see that it has Johnny’s face!  As soon as I throw it away, another one is sucking at my leg or my breast or my neck.  They all have his face.  I push them away and struggle with them, but they keep coming back, sucking at me.

Signed,

Creeped Out by Leaches

Dear Creeped Out,

While you don’t mention that you have a similar talent or the same level of early success that Johnny had, it seems likely that you do.  After all, your dream is suggesting that you parallel him in pattern of behavior.  Whatever it is in you that gives in too quickly and resists working hard when the going gets tough is very Johnny-like.  It is sucking at you, draining your lifeblood, your vigor and your chances for greater success in your chosen endeavors.

If you do not recognize the similarity between yourself and Johnny immediately, here’s a method that will help you pin it down:  You’ve just had ‘the dream.’  Write it down along with the events and circumstances of your waking life.  Chances are excellent that something’s going on that has you feeling defeated.  You just don’t have any more energy to give it.  Face it.  That’s what Johnny said to himself.  Why try when it’s so hard?

Still not ringing a bell?  That’s OK.  Wait until the dream comes again.  Write it down again along with the current events and circumstances.  You will begin to see quickly that this dream comes when you are in your “Johnny mode” of giving up instead of trying harder to achieve the goals to which you give lip service.

You must break this habit Dear Dreamer or your trajectory will flatten as well.

Sweet Dreams to You!

Sex, death and automobiles!

In anticipation of the 31^st Annual Conference of the International Association for the Study of Dreams, to be held at the Doubletree Hotel at the Berkeley Marina, June 4-8, 2014, let’s take a look at some timeless insights into dream meaning by the Reverend JeremyTaylor, Co-Founder and Past President of the IASD.

Dear Dreamers,

You most likely have known me to dissuade you from subscribing to any source of information about dreams that claims to know definitively that “if you dream ‘this’ it means ‘this.’”

Dreams are too personal and too complex to be reduced to such simplistic terms!

But, having said that, we can look to certain archetypal images that occur in dreams across the spectrum of dreamers.  Even their implications for an individual dreamer cannot be summed up in a pat “definition;” but as former President of the International Association for the Study of Dreams, Reverend Jeremy Taylor says, their metaphorical message “turns out to be true so often, that it’s worth asking if it might be true” for the current dream you’re working on. 

Keeping mindful of the already-stated caveat, Taylor goes on to discuss several dream images with which you are no doubt are familiar:

1.      1.  Vehicles, specifically automobiles:  These will frequently provide analogies to the physical self.  If something is wrong with your car in your dream, it is a good starting place to look for a corresponding physical symptom in your own body.  Or, there may be a literal tie to your actual, waking-life automobile.  Brakes fail in your dream; check your brakes in your waking life.

      2.   Death:  In our dreams, is not to be feared.  Death represents a dramatic change through emotional growth.  You cannot grow up and become, let’s say, a more empathetic person until you experience the death of your self-centered, uncaring self.  Even dreams of suicide speak to our deliberate choice to change our way of being in waking life.  In effect, death is the necessary precursor to rebirth as a “new, improved” person!

3.     3. Sex:  Almost always, overt sex in our dreams will be addressing a longing in our waking life.  Here it is important to spend time understanding our sex partner.  If your dreaming self has you in an intimate embrace with a former professional colleague, for example, it will be helpful to think about the salient qualities that person has.  Your dream suggests that you are longing to make them your own.  According to Taylor, dreams of same sex love or attraction reflect your own deepening sense of self-acceptance.

There are, of course, many more archetypal images that frequent our dreams.  Beginning your exploration with such timeless approaches is a sure gateway to understanding your dreams.  From there, dream work shifts naturally to the personal application that will change your thinking and change your life!

If you can attend the IASD Conference in Berkeley, by all means do!  You will have a rich and worthwhile experience.  In any case, please continue to Send Me Your Dreams!

Sweet Dreams to You!

sendmeyourdreams@yahoo.com

Dreamer throws hand grenade down the storm drain!

If your dream presents you with an explosion or even the potential for one, you must pay close attention to its implications.  Today’s dreamer seems out of harm’s way, but still should validate that conclusion with her doctor.

Dear SMYD,

At a reunion recently, I sat at the kitchen table with four generations of women from my family.  I had a great time except for learning one extremely troubling thing:  My mom and aunts and grandma all talked about a debilitating condition that they say runs in our family.  I know it’s partly superstition, but now I’m really scared.

Then I dreamed I was standing on a metal grid over a storm drain.  I was with another woman who was dressed as though she was from the 30’s.  She wore a big wool camel-colored coat with broad padded shoulders.  She had auburn hair in a 1930’s coif.  She was beautiful with perfect skin and red lips.  We were standing side-by-side on this grid over a storm drain.  It must have rained - the streets were wet.

Then a young man came and handed her something.  I could see that it was a hand grenade and he had pulled the pin.  It had that lever on the side that when released would allow it to explode.  Somehow I got it from her and pushed it between the metal bars of the grid.

It started to fall and I knew it was going to explode below us.  But it continued to fall for a long, long, long time.  When it finally did explode it was so far below us that it was amazing.  We had no idea the drainpipe was so long and deep.  We heard it explode and could see the flash of the explosion, but we were unharmed and laughed a little laugh of relief.

Signed,

Family Bombshell

Dear Bombshell,

Your dream seems to speak about the things deep in your family history -  from grandmother’s generation and earlier - that you are worried could be harmful to you.  You are standing there with someone who could be your grandmother, looking beautiful and perfect, when this bomb arrives, similar to the way the news was delivered to you at the table.

You mention your belief that the condition your family members referred to is mostly superstition.  So in your dream, you stuff it into the drain pipe even though you know it is going to explode.  This is not your best plan of action.  While you do not want to assume a literal meaning for your dream, it is prudent to respond to all possibilities.  Check with your doctor about the condition and its propensity to follow families.  Then you can set your mind at ease.

Happily, in your dream the explosion is so deep, so far below, it is essentially harmless.  This is most likely the outcome you will find as you complete your due diligence in researching with your doctor.  Then you can again laugh that little laugh of relief.

Sweet Dreams to You, Dear Dreamer!

Driving with Miss Cindy

Any time you let someone else do the driving, you are subject to their whims.

If a dreamer takes a back seat in her own car or relinquishes control to someone she barely knows, as today’s dreamer did, caution is called for.  Notice how the tone of her dream changes when she asserts her feelings.

Dear SMYD,

I have been living on my own for over a year now.  It’s good because my dad died and my mom couldn’t really afford to feed me.  The hard part is that I can’t always afford to feed myself!  I have two pretty good jobs and pay my rent on time every month, but my diet is mostly cereal and milk, mac and cheese and Top Ramen!  Not so good.

I have met a new friend at one of my jobs, “Cindy,” and we are talking about becoming roommates.  It would definitely help me to have someone share the rent and buy the groceries.  We are about the same age, but she is married, and they aren’t getting along.  So she needs a place to stay for a little while so she can think things over.

Last night I dreamed that Cindy was driving my car and I was riding in the back seat.  She seemed careless and I was concerned about her driving.  So I did some backseat driving of my own.  I warned her to look out for a curb and watch out when another car came too close.  She didn’t like my directions very much at first.  But soon we both relaxed and she drove us to a nice old foreign looking town.  We stopped there and had a good time.

Signed,

Riding Around with Cindy at the Wheel

Dear Riding,

Your dream offers two powerful metaphors that demand your attention.  Taking a back seat speaks clearly to the idea of putting yourself in the background in a relationship.  You do not say your exact age, but assuming you are quite young, perhaps it is normal to step back and observe how someone more worldly, a married woman, does things.  But the fact that you let her drive you – your car – can be worrisome.  Generally, it is not a good idea to let someone else run your life, especially someone you know so little about!

Still, you speak up for yourself when you feel uncomfortable with how things are going.  That is important for you to remember, Dear Dreamer.  Your dream suggests that when you assert yourself, Cindy will respond in such a way that you both can relax and be comfortable.

You wind up in a place you are both unfamiliar with, the foreign town.  The implication is that you both will learn some things you did not expect to learn and enjoy the ride as you do.  This bodes well for your time with Cindy so long as you watch the road closely and make your feelings known.  Just because you let her drive this time, doesn’t mean it’s OK to let her run your life!

Sweet Dreams to You!